Perhaps the most moving moment of any wedding ceremony is the point at which the couple turn to each other on the altar and deliver their vows. Whether the vows are the traditional religious ones or vows written by the couple themselves, it is a time when the guests can see the joy that the couple inspire in each other just by looking at each other.
Many feel that writing your own vows adds authenticity, while others are of the belief that sticking to wedding tradition is the way to go, whichever you prefer, preparation is key. If you are a groom to be and are looking to ensure that the romance of this moment continues past the looking and into the speaking, then you should take some of the tips in this article...
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Wedding Vows
By: Uttara Manohar
Planning to tie the knot soon and need help with your wedding vows? Here are some useful tips and suggestions for wedding vows...
Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
~ Kahlil Gibran
Wedlock symbolizes not an austere bond but a willingly pledged promise of love and togetherness. The near and dear ones always grace weddings and the couple promises to love, respect and support each other unconditionally in everyone’s presence. Wedding vows are ways to express the love, excitement and commitment that the couples feel towards each other. Wedding vows need not always be fancy and ornamental, but rather straight, simple and genuine.
Wedding vows can embrace many emotions including, love, joy, humor, honesty and so on. While you are writing your wedding vows, all you need to do is pick the right words, which will convey the exact feelings to your partner. Many a times people find this task a bit intimidating. Many religions require the bride and groom to use the traditional set of wedding vows. However nowadays, many of the couples want to personalize their wedding vows and word their feelings in a way that they want. So in case you are planning to personalize your wedding vows, you need to talk to your ceremony officiant and find out if you can incorporate your own wedding vows. There also exits a golden mean wherein the couples recite the traditional wedding vows, which are then followed by their own personalized wedding vows.
Writing you own wedding vows is always better than hiring someone to write them for your or plainly picking up wedding vows from a book or a website. A little bit of help is allowed though! Wedding vows are a simple way for the couple to express their love, respect, and commitment towards each other. There are people who are naturally gifted with the ability to say the right words at the right time, without any prior preparations. However, even if you are one of these people, remember that weddings are not the time to display your oratory skills and hence a little bit of preparation beforehand will ensure you say everything you want to in a perfect manner. Writing down a brief outline or the entire wedding vows verbatim might be a good idea.
Many a times when people start writing their wedding vows, there are instances where they feel stuck, and face a block. If this is happening to you, do not panic. Follow this simple trick. Close your eyes and recollect all your fond memories with your partner. Think of your first date, your first kiss and so on. Now try and remember the way you felt when you were with your partner and remember the moment when you decided you wanted to get married. Now open your eyes and write down everything that you just thought about. You need not use big words and flowery language, just stick to simple words and express yourself. As you begin to write your wedding vows, think of it as a conversation with your partner and jot down the thoughts as they flow from your mind. Do not make your wedding vows too lengthy. Keep them short and sweet. Some people might frown upon it but there are couples that incorporate an element of humor in their wedding vows, which can be fun if taken in the right spirit by everyone. In case you need some inspiration, incorporate beautiful poetry verses or literary quotes. Often while reading great writers’ works we feel that the lines have managed to capture the exact emotions that we have in mind. Do not hesitate to use such lines in your wedding vows.
Traditional or personalized, no matter which type of wedding vows, you’ve finalized, make sure to practice you vows in order to avoid any gaffe at the wedding ceremony. Although some couples carry their written wedding vows and read out the wedding vows from a paper, it is always more romantic to say the words without referring to any not or paper. Rehearse your wedding vows adequately so that when you walk down the aisle and face your would-be-spouse, you can look into each other’s eyes and say the right things with the perfect words, as your family and friends shower you with good luck and blessings on the occasion.
By Uttara Manohar
Published: 3/24/2008
Available at: http://www.buzzle.com/articles/wedding-vows.html
As is clear, practice makes perfect. The nerves that you will have on the altar are proven to distort even the most composed of public speaking minds, so even if you are sure that you have learnt your vows word for word, it is crucial that you keep a copy of the words somewhere on your person. Beyond that, the only thing to do is to be yourself, and cherish the moment with the woman that you will spend the rest of your life with.
