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From the “On the Contrary” column – So begins the better news

So there I was in the far corner of the Local Pub and Grill with the Big White Dog, peacefully reading the few pages of the newspaper when Luke the Dude sat himself down heavily and spilled his beer. The dog took offense to this undesired bath and left, barking at Luke from the door. 

Thus started the next congregation of cheerful conversationists, who had sauntered in when I wasn’t paying attention. Time to address the affairs of our town and the world. 

“Before we start,” started The Prof, nodding at Stevie the Poet, “I believe we should lift our glasses to our learned friend Steven (cheers and vivas) for his spot-on exposition last time on how the ANC transmogrified from centsless to billionaire in mere months.”

The Prof raised his tankard and toasts rang out as The Governor approvingly spied the emptying glasses.  

“Some of The Prof’s colleagues are fingering Russia as the money tree,” informed Miss Lily, “whereas The Poet set out clearly that Iran was the Father Christmas to our ruling, ahem, párty.”  

“All well and wealthy for the ANC, while none of the loot is benefitting South Africa,” frowned Bill the Beard.

“What do you mean!” challenged Big Ben, “the ANC is doing a great job! Look around you.”

“Okay, let’s do that,” grinned The Beard: “ANC bigshots are living like barons, with a little help from their friends and repeated turns to eat, while taxpayers have to make a taxable living despite unreliable electricity, dysfunctional harbours, crumbling roads, no railway network, I could carry on.”

“Please do,” said Irene the Queen, nodding her head enthusiastically.

Bill the Beard smiled: “The point is that the same action that rescued the ANC from bankruptcy is damaging South Africa. SA ties with Israel are broken while those with major trading partners are fraying. We are talking essential imports and exports. Ask the farmers you know.

“But all is not lost. Meet public law professor Koos Malan, as reported by LitNet and Netwerk24.

“His gist is that South Africans have been making a plan to become ANC-proof as the government fails and goes increasingly AWOL in duties like policing and electricity. South Africans, from business and cultural organisations to fed-up citizens, are rolling up their sleeves to get the job done. The biggest example is the Western Cape government, growing increasingly assertive to fix ANC failures such as the Cape Town harbour and the need for a second international airport for the growing population in the crescent around Cape Town, from Somerset West and Stellenbosch westwards. 

When the Post Office was collapsing, its services were taken over by private enterprise and when Telkom was failing, it was replaced by cell-phone companies and internet providers. Better education is increasingly available from pre-school to tertiary levels. Trade relations will be next,” concluded Bill the Beard.

The story continues. Watch this space.

Also, please diarise May 29 and turn up to vote.


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